why do i feel so alone?????

I guess the fairytale is over as short as it was I will never forget….I guess you gone but your never forgotten……I thought it could really be u and me like the mid twenties Hov and B…..really i wanted you in my life forever the true definition of wifing your name plus my only separated by a hyphen…….i cant see em coming down my eyes so i hide behind dark tinted lenses…..dreaming of us riding in 745’s and benzes birthday wishes coming true and sealing the deal with i do kisses…….no more flashing lights but i guess messing with me caused you to think that you were cheating yourself……..to good to be true……i cant really explain it i was so into u….now i cant mention you in my interviews now…..i guess you just a friend to me now…….i’d do a bid lose a rib bust a gat trust in that run up to heavens door exchange my life for yours - *Jay-Z* - “Anything”……… i cant believe we parting ways like Ben and JLo…….hook onto u like u was blue magic……dope……real talk u the best i never had…..i wish so bad that i had…..you back……..i know me going out every night was whack……did u really get me back like that?????? oh well never mind but if you find the time please listen to all these words that i have written for you….u make me feel high i never wanna come down……i love to make u laugh so u would say baby u a clown loving u for a lifetime is all that i want….i don't give you the time you deserve from me…..this is something i know, i know, i know………when I'm not with u i feel like your so far gone but now that your gone i feel so far gone and all alone…….i think about that angelic face and that smile that lights up a room when you show it………those eyes wow….when god made u i thought he made u for me and he took the blueprint and hid it for no one ever to see…..was it me????was it something i said???????did i come on to strong?????did i forget something??????was there something i missed??????? forever isn't real and u know I'm not gonna be here much longer…..all u did was change your hair and u looked perfect…..but u were a picture of perfection from the moment our eyes met……. so i guess we never really met and your just a girl in my dreams…………i guess this is good bye, goodnight and good luck…i got my bags packed with a pack of Newport's steady lighting em up……baby I'm going on an airplane and i don't know if I'm coming back again……..i must be going crazy like ceelo green……this hurts like a paper cut……why do i feel so alone???????